Random August

"Ey." (This is me, getting ready to make a nuisance of myself.)
"Yeh?" (This is an unsuspecting victim.)
"If my fingers were really penises, would you still talk to me?"
"No."
"Really? Come on!"
"Make that 'Oh, hell, no.'"
"Don't you want me to run my ten dainty penises down your back?"
"Er...."
"Or I could tangle them in your hair..."
"Augh."
"...wrap them round your hand...."
"Stop that!"
"Hey, if my fingers were penises, and I took off my gloves in public, would that be indecent exposure?"
"Don't you have somewhere else to be?"